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[23 Aug 2009|01:12am] |
College.
well, change is good.
i'm getting pretty tired of it here anyway.
i'll probably change my mind as soon as i get there
i dont think i could ever not miss carmel
it's part of me, at this point.
but, so it goes.
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[09 Feb 2009|11:42pm] |
i'm really trying
i hope things get better
leaving for california friday
i'm so fucking excited to get out of this town
i want my old friends
i want my old face
i want my old mind, fuck this time and place.
i'm feeling better about everything...
much more together
but i fucked up bad with school this semester
ugh
i hope colleges still like me.
i dont think they will
anyways
i need to go to victoria's secret teusday or wed. or thurs.
i'm scared to go by myself.. lol
shits been really dumb with everything.
sometimes i just hate myself
it sounds dumb, but i do such dumb things
ahhh
anyways
LAUREN LOPEZ
i miss you.
i'm sorry i've been retarted.
and busy and dumb.
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[15 Jan 2009|09:40pm] |
i'm a little bit fucked.
FUCK.
ugh.
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[10 Jan 2009|04:07pm] |
I've abandoned my livejournal..
i forgor about it
:(
well
i've been failing life.
i dont even know anymore
everytime i see you, i'm torn between wanting to fucking beat the shit out of you
and just wanting to puke
you fucking disguist me, and i just want to hurt you.
GO DIE PLEASE.
thanks
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[12 Nov 2008|09:08pm] |
i feel like livejournal's dying
and i'm going to really really disappoint my dad and my self when report cards come out
i dont know what i'm going to do
i've never ever ever ever done so badly in school
fuck.
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[02 Nov 2008|08:12pm] |
i'm starting to feel like someone should go fuck themself.
the less i hear from anthony, the less tolerance i have for anything
i'm getting more depressed, the farther away he gets
I want to deck jane in the fucking face
i'm starting to see what happened between my dad and her dad
it's fucking retarted
i'm so terribly angry.
i havent spoken to anthony since he left the united states
i hate everything.
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[29 Oct 2008|09:09pm] |
i love dumb fucking skank-ass bitches.
argh.
i have a headache.
anthony's on deployment, on the other side of the world
:(
that sucks.
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[24 Sep 2008|09:14pm] |
I'm so dead.
i dont even know
it's so hard for me to think.. about anything.
anthony's coming home on teusday!!
i'm pretty excited.
hmm. really really really busy all the time
hopefully getting a car soon
want to get my nails and hair done.. so kill me.
not going to be able to afford that shit
so looks like i'm not quitting my job
oh my god i need to quit
it makes me miserable.
:-\
anyways
mad drama.
people need to stop being dicksssss
spot is breathing really loud
what a pup
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[09 Sep 2008|09:33pm] |
i dont like worrying about so much
i need a therapist.
or a timeturner.
or a clone.
something to get my mind off of all the shit i need to do
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[08 Sep 2008|09:43pm] |
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FUCK
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[03 Sep 2008|08:02pm] |
wow.
i am fucking so disguisted with you right now
like, literally sick to my stomach
i dont know why i even care so much about such a horrible friend.
fuck this
if you want it better, you need to say something
i'm already tired of this shit
i dont know why it even still surprises me that you're going to be like that.
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[03 Sep 2008|03:27pm] |
loved seeing everyone
hated the realization that i'm fucked,
back to school
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[31 Aug 2008|12:21am] |
be more cool.
even though i dont think it's possible.
tonight was good.
i need to hang out with these people more.
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[29 Aug 2008|11:53pm] |
i'm less confused.
i just really hope things pan out well.
i've been thinking a lot
maybe too much.
i love him.
i am basically fucked when it comes to summer work.
but really excited for school.
if it werent for summer assignments, and college and scholarships and financial aid to worry about.. i'd be able to enjoy this year thoroughly
i'm pretty scared that that's going to ruin it though
and working too much is gonna killit.
but i need the money
it would be cool of all these problems with my friends didnt exist.
i just dont understand people sometimes.
:-\
anyone need a best friend?
i'm gonna put an ad in the paper.
because i'd like to be one.. if someone could appreciate it.
ergh.
not good, not good.
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[20 Aug 2008|11:31pm] |
well. things are teetering between good and bad.
i just need to get my shit done.
i want everything to end up good.
:-\
yo soy tired.
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[19 Aug 2008|07:43pm] |
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fucking cool.
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[16 Aug 2008|02:22am] |
i'm lovin on life right now.
it's real good.
i love my hair!
so much
and i loved tonight
i mean.. some of it..
okay, just one part, really
:-D
that's how i feel right now
anyways.
i dont know
i feel like nothing can bother me right now
except for the fact that i got a manicure 2 days ago and the fucking nail polish is flaking off already
isnt that fucking bullshit?!?!
:(
but anyways
peace
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[05 Aug 2008|11:42pm] |
okay.. so everythings real nice right now.
i'm so glad we worked things out...
basically
for now at least.
shit's real good.
on another note,
i need to make a lot of money, fast.
does anyone know of anything that i could do to accomplish this?
i need enough money to buy a car..
like 1000.
or maybe 500 depending on my dad.
now i need that
PLUS i need to pay for my hair
preferably my nails... but that doesnt really matter.
i need to be able to buy (giants tickets for anthony for when he comes home... sh.)
which is really expensive... but i really want to do it
i need to buy ****** tickets for ____ and ____
and i need to buy stomp tickets for my dad and anthony
i guess need isnt really true..
but i would like to.
i also need to make sure my dad doesnt hate anthony.
because i certainly dont
:]
so the car i need really really soon
but the rest i dont need until october...
maybe january for one of them
:-\
i dont make shit at my job and it really bothers me.
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[02 Aug 2008|08:27pm] |
well to be honest
i can say so many things to you right now
but i'm going to give you a chance to fix things.
but if you dont. dont expect me to be here for you when shit goes wrong.
that's probably a lie.
but i'm still pretty fucking pissed off at you right now
i hate everything.
and i'm going to fucking kill someone.
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[01 Aug 2008|01:02am] |
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mood |
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cant get over how cool friends can be.
and i'm being completely serious
not sarcastic at all
yuppp
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rainyday315's journal